Me! ([info]platys) wrote in [info]knitting,
2005-04-01 09:50:00
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How to Felt With Acrylic.

I know that there is a huge demand for information on how to felt with acrylic yarn. After exhaustive research, I've written up the following guide. I hope it is helpful!

How To Felt with Acrylic Yarn
by Gail

List of Materials Needed:

1. Some acrylic yarn. Make sure it doesn't have any natural fiber content in it whatsoever. That would be bad.
2. An oversized stock pot. The one you attempted to use to Brine your turkey before you accidentally killed all your relatives will serve you well here. Plus, it'll hide the evidence.
3. A blow torch.
4. An oven. Preferrably one that you don't plan on using much in the future.
5. A welding sheild.
6. Some tongs.
7. Some leather gloves. Not the nice ones - the heat shielding kind.

Step 1:

Knit something out of that acrylic. Make it bigger than you want the final results to be.

Step 2:

Drinking some alcohol is probably a good idea here.

Step 3:

Turn on the oven as high as it will go. Throw your knitted acrylic garment into the oversized stock pot, and stick that in the oven. It is a matter of great debate on whether or not you should add water - water will probably slow the felting process, but may keep the yarn from melting to the bottom of the pot. Maybe you should add some canola oil or something.

Step 4:

Open a window. Take the batteries out of the fire alarm.

Step 5:

Check on your garment. If all is going well, it will become soft and melty. With the gloves and tongs, coax it into the shape you want. You may also want to stir it around to make sure that it isn't sticking.

Step 6:

Once your garment has shrunk down and appears to be the correct shape, remove the stockpot from the oven. Throw a bunch of water into it. You might want to put on the welders shield now. Then, with the tongs, remove the item from the pot, and arrange it charmingly. You should no longer be able to see individual stitches. You may find that your garment is a bit inflexible - that is to be expected.

Step 7:

Once your garment has cooled, you can use the blow torch and tongs to make any last minute adjustments, such as creating holes in your slippers for the feet.

Step 8:

Enjoy your fabulous felted acrylic garment! Tune in next week where Gail explains how to use flexible rods to keep your stockinette from curling!

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  • 49 comments
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[info]yokospungeon

April 1 2005, 15:52:42 UTC 7 years ago

ROFL!

>creating holes in your slippers for the feet

OMG, so funny!

[info]hoyland54

April 1 2005, 15:53:39 UTC 7 years ago

Brilliant. Now if only I had an oven...

[info]platys

April 1 2005, 15:55:49 UTC 7 years ago

If you had a blow torch, you could probably felt by hand. Well, I'd keep my hand out of the way, but you get the point.

[info]stacye13

7 years ago

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[info]chasingmyself

7 years ago

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[info]likelystory

7 years ago

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[info]weissesfleisch

5 years ago

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[info]surreal_rebirth

April 1 2005, 15:56:28 UTC 7 years ago

rofl...how funny!

[info]geekling

April 1 2005, 15:58:06 UTC 7 years ago

*giggle*

[info]irihs

April 1 2005, 15:59:14 UTC 7 years ago

:-D

you win!

[info]rudbekia

April 1 2005, 15:59:32 UTC 7 years ago

Gail, you are in Evil Bitch mood today, aren't you? Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[info]platys

April 1 2005, 16:00:17 UTC 7 years ago

Wait, I haven't even posted the new rules yet, now that my dominion over the knitting community is complete!

[info]lilsailorknits

April 1 2005, 15:59:58 UTC 7 years ago

This is too funny! Thanks for posting this!

[info]mudflapgirl

April 1 2005, 16:03:04 UTC 7 years ago

Hilarious!

Stock pot - Check.
Blow torch - Check.
Oven - Check.
Welding sheild - Check check.
Tongs - And then some.
Leather gloves - aaaaand check.

Now where do you find this stuff called "acrylic yarn?"

[info]poipill

April 1 2005, 16:26:06 UTC 7 years ago

Re: Hilarious!

I think they sell it at the wall store.

[info]jennfurr

7 years ago

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[info]sehkmet

April 1 2005, 16:04:59 UTC 7 years ago

Hahaha. Excellent post.

Deleted comment

[info]mangojellytoast

April 1 2005, 19:55:23 UTC 7 years ago

I thought Michael's at least carried LB Fisherman's Wool? No?

[info]emmacrew

7 years ago

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[info]elabeth

7 years ago

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[info]princess_eowyn

7 years ago

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[info]_coelacanth_

April 1 2005, 16:08:55 UTC 7 years ago

hahahahahahahaah!

[info]princesspetunia

April 1 2005, 16:09:00 UTC 7 years ago

I believe you now owe me a large coffee and a new set of sinuses.

Excuse me while I clean off my monitor.

[info]fleur

April 1 2005, 16:11:17 UTC 7 years ago

Awesome, thanks for posting! :)

[info]lauralieluv

April 1 2005, 16:17:52 UTC 7 years ago

Snarktastic! A joy to read!

[info]duckiemonster

April 1 2005, 16:20:09 UTC 7 years ago

*sniggers*

*checks date*

[info]kightp

April 1 2005, 16:28:42 UTC 7 years ago

My April Fools' Day is complete.

[info]linzq

April 1 2005, 16:28:47 UTC 7 years ago

Oh, that was great.
Thanks for the laugh!
SushiQ <")))><: Domo!">

[info]sushiq

April 1 2005, 16:29:07 UTC 7 years ago

Steps 2 & 4 are my favorite ones. That's funny! :)

[info]monkeyhouse

April 1 2005, 16:31:24 UTC 7 years ago

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!

[info]wild_roses

April 1 2005, 16:35:43 UTC 7 years ago

AWESOME. *nod* *giggle*

[info]surreal_rebirth

April 1 2005, 16:38:34 UTC 7 years ago

do you mind if i link to this in the crochet community?

[info]platys

April 1 2005, 16:41:33 UTC 7 years ago

Go ahead. :)

[info]rudbekia

7 years ago

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[info]surreal_rebirth

7 years ago

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[info]rudbekia

7 years ago

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[info]hillarygayle

April 1 2005, 16:48:37 UTC 7 years ago

This was amazingly funny. I love it.

[info]thesqueak

April 1 2005, 17:05:09 UTC 7 years ago

This is an example of a good April Fool's joke. :p

[info]blaueteufelin

April 1 2005, 19:04:19 UTC 7 years ago

agreed.

[info]extraneousrooot

April 1 2005, 18:35:34 UTC 7 years ago

Hahahaha.

Thank you for being funny without being mean spirited. See, it IS possible, even at [info]knitting!

[info]olliekitty

April 1 2005, 19:20:38 UTC 7 years ago

ha ha ha

nice april fools post.

I love it

*giggles*
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