"We know that hand knits knitted with Coats & Clark Red Heart 'Wintuk' Orlon yarn can take normal wear and tear better than those knit from competitive yarns. But when we got this unsolicited testimonial from Mrs. Fred Bard of Thornton, California, even we were astonished to learn what our yarn really could take.
"Read what she said:
"How true your ad in the September issue of Good Housekeeping is!!
"My husband and I lived at a Mobile Home Park on Andrus Island out of Isleton, California. On June 21, 1972 at 1:15 A.M. the levee broke about 200 yards from our house. We waded out in our pajamas in waist deep water. Our coach was completely covered with flood water and eventually collapsed and disintegrated. We lost everything, including our car.
"Five months later, when the flood water was all pumped out, my husband was looking around to see if he could salvage anything. He found a sweater-coat that I had just knitted from Red Heart "Wintuk" and that I was very proud of. It had been in the mud and muck for five months. He brought it out to show me he found it. He washed it off with the water hose. I put it through the washer and dryer and it looks as good as the first day I wore it.
"I am sure sold on Red Heart 'Wintuk'!!
"Sincerely, Mrs. Fred Bard."
The poor sweater had been in a virtual cesspool for five months, yet was unharmed. So we may conclude that, much like Twinkies and cockroaches, your handknitted acrylic heirlooms will likely survive the impending nuclear holocaust. Shouldn't your next sweater be made of Red Heart "Wintuk"??